On a stick..........

Why is everything suddenly more appealing on a stick? Cake pops, Peeps on a stick (which I humbly admit I used on my Easter table), and now PIE POPS? WTF people. Pie does not belong on a stick. Even cake is pushing the envelope.

Pops refers to something that is akin to a lollipop. Like a.....lollipop. A lollipop is just a piece of candy on a stick. It makes it very easy to eat the candy, and when you're done, you just throw away the stick. The stick is simply a vehicle for the food to enter your mouth. But when you start putting everything on a stick.......I don't know...

There's a funny iCarly episode where a guy puts tacos on a stick. But there has to be a line drawn somewhere, no? I mean, are we going to start serving pasta on a stick? Sliders on a stick? Truth be told, you can put a stick in ANY food and call it a "pop".

The problem is, when you put cake on a stick, it falls off the stick. Like, after the first bite. Then, you put your hand under it to catch the falling pieces and suddenly you are just eating cake out of your hand without the benefit of a paper plate and plastic fork. Lame.

I can only imagine pie on a stick. Ohhh, what fun, catching sticky, gooey, blueberries in your hand as they fall off a stick. Even ice cream, which has been served on a stick for centuries, has always had a bad reputation for bailing off the stick before you're finished eating. Who hasn't caught a chunk of popsicle in their hand? Or experienced the disappointment of the last, perfect bite of an ice cream bar sliding prematurely to the ground.

I always refer to balloons as "disappointment on a string". Balloons either fly away, get popped, or lose all their air and just look all sad and limp. What a racket. Well, "pops" are disappointment on a stick. Even the most gooey food will fall off a stick, and who wants to pay a premium price for a treat (you know, because it's on a STICK and all) only to have it fall apart and end up slurping it out of your hand, or, worse, watching it fall to the ground. Anything on a stick should be a one-bite wonder. If it can't be consumed in one bite, don't put it on a stick! Except for things on a skewer, which are designed to lay horizontally.

Although.....if the appeal of serving something on a stick really gets people excited, why not try brussels sprouts on a stick? Or broccoli trees on a stick?

I'm "sticking" with lollipops. They're safe. They stay on the stick till the very end.