Mountain men are expensive..........

The mountain man show is in town again! Yay. I agreed to go with Jeff, as I did last year, only this year I actually knew what I was getting myself into.

First off, I took exception to the signs that said "Cascade Mountain Men" everywhere with NO mention of the fairer sex and I pointed out that it was International Women's Day so why weren't the women being represented? Jeff took it upon himself to actually bring my complaint to the ladies at the gate collecting money and they were no help at all. They said "We just collect the money." Well, THEY are not going to change the world, that's for sure. 

This year, we actually went with a wish list. Jeff had many items he was looking for, in his quest to go further and further into the past until he actually BECOMES Merriweather Lewis. Or William Clark. Or perhaps just Scannon the dog. Fun fact, Scannon's real name is Seaman, but someone couldn't read Clark's handwriting back in the day so for years all of you Lewis and Clark fans have been calling the dog Scannon when he was Seaman all along. Anyway.

The big-ticket item he was looking for was a replica 1803 Harper's Ferry flint lock muzzleloader rifle. Because that's the kind they carried on the Lewis and Clark expedition or something. We did find the gun and we bought it. But that's the super short version of the story. Because we had to talk FOREVER to the guy selling it. And a bunch of other guys dressed in buckskin with names like "Overload" and "Trapper." It was all ".58 caliber" and "modern sights" and blah, blah, blah.

We also found Jeff a tin cup, a thingy that you strike with flint and it makes fire, and a mini powder horn. And a bunch of other boring stuff. Oh, and a super cool hat! I picked it out.

Also? I threw a tomahawk at a wood target and it stuck! Ok, I also threw it at a fence and on the ground but on my third try it stuck! I felt like Pocahontas! I mean, if Pocahontas threw tomahawks and all.

But of course the best part was the people watching and "stuff." Such as:

These fur pelts. I don't know which poor animals had to die for this. But they were very soft. 

People dressed like this. Everywhere. 

Mr. Smee, of Peter Pan fame, was there.

This man, who told me he's been a pirate for the past six years. And by that he meant he dresses like a pirate and goes to bars with other guys dressed like pirates. I wanna be a pirate!

We are the Red Men, feathers in our head men, down among the dead men, pow wow! (Side note, I later learned that this man was wearing no pants. Why the jacket and no pants? I don't think dress blues and loincloths go together but maybe that's just me?)

I was so tempted, too! 

These dudes, who were dressed as Navy men from long ago. They talked to us for a LONG time about the different whistles and what they meant, and how only the whistle guy was allowed to salute with his left hand. All I asked was to take their picture and I got a history lesson. 

For the ladies! A whole table of corsets. And this one on display. Very pretty. I was carrying around a flyer from this booth and another guy asked me if I was getting married. He thought I was making my wedding dress. I mean, never mind the diamond ring on my left hand, which is generally the universal symbol for "I snagged my mountain man, yessiree, and I'm gonna go cook him up some vittles in this here cast iron skillet!"

A lantern. I dunno. I liked the red. And it's blurry. Sorry 'bout that. 

Eye won't say eye had a GREAT time at the mountain man show but eye guess it was o.k. 

The takeaway message is this: mountain man shows are weird and expensive. But you can learn to make fire and throw sharp things and those skills might come in handy during a zombie apocalypse. At the very least, you can pick yourself up a nice beaver hat or a piece of buckskin to make yourself buckskin underwear or something. And you just never know when you're going to need that.