Why is it that when stressful things happen they always happen when there is no time? I mean, why aren't there just pockets of time during the day for us to stress out and go nuts? Instead, we stress during pockets of time that are running out the door, or late to a meeting.
This morning Harrison put his shoes on. Then took them back off saying "These are not my shoes! These shoes are too small!" He then reminded me that his friend had the same shoes and came to the conclusion that he must have worn Harrison's shoes home. Except that particular friend was NOT EVEN HERE this weekend. So, there is no way they could have been his shoes. No, what probably happened is that Harrison's feet grew (overnight? It's possible!) and the shoes are now too small. Or he was just being picky. Or any number of other explanations. Either way, he had to wear his "choir shoes" to school and he was mortified. Now, before you get images of spit-polished wing-tips, let me say his "choir shoes" are really just stylized black tennis shoes. Not dorky at all. Still..........no wonder people have heart attacks in the morning!
Today is crazy, as usual. I mean, if it's not one thing, it's another around here. We thrive on chaos and a bit of stress but sometimes it gets to be too much. I have learned that one of my biggest stressors is having to transport kids to different places with not enough time to get them all there. Today is one of those days. I am only one person, and I simply cannot be in two places at once. And yet, I am expected to be. I think I've got it all worked out, thanks to a sympathetic receptionist who is allowing me to be a little late to the last appointment, but it will require me to work with military precision to execute it all.
Which brings me to another issue - job searching. I mean, if that isn't stress, I don't know what is. I cannot imagine what people go through, especially those who are the sole supporters for their family. Job searching is so demoralizing and time consuming. And I'm not even sure what kind of job I want, or can do, or even if I can work outside the home and still meet the needs of my family. In a perfect world, I'd stay home and make everything run smoothly. I'd be the person who responds to all the emergencies (wait, I AM that person), and keeps things on a somewhat even keel. But adding a paying outside job to all of that seems impossible. Not that I haven't done it. I just quit a very good job, but the reasons for that were multi-faceted and it was the right option. Still, someone needs to make money to feed us. Jeff makes enough money to keep the roof over our heads and the bills paid, but not enough to feed us, clothes us or contend with the bazillion other expenses that loom each and every day. So, I need a job. Or at least I need money. I'm working on it and have a few things going, but it's not enough by any means. So, I keep searching for the perfect job, and it's elusive, if not impossible, to find. Stress.
Then, there's the daily irritation of household chores and who should do them. I can't do them all, nor should I, because there are six people living in this house and I'm sure not making all the messes. But the kids' bathroom is constantly condemnation-worthy, their rooms are scattered and messy and no one seems to be able to change the toilet paper or pick anything up off the floor. I delegate and assign chores, but when they are not done correctly, that becomes another part time job for me to oversee all of the indiscretions and fix them (or direct someone to fix them). It's ridiculous. And time consuming. And really not fun at all.
I realize my stress seems to be amplified by hormones. Which is a whole other issue. Now that I'm of a "certain age" I don't seem to be able to accurately predict which days of the month I will be a screaming banshee. So, I have these sudden flares of insanity and wonder, what the heck was that? Gotta love the "change of life".
I'd take a vacation if I could afford it. But at this point the only vacation available to me is a road trip in a smallish camper with four children and three dogs. Somehow that doesn't scream "relax" to me! It's no wonder why people drink. Is it 5 o'clock somewhere?
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