Since Christmas is less than a week away, you're likely in over your head (and budget) and feel like you've been spending money right and left for weeks now. Even if you stick to a budget, there always seems to be "one more thing" to spend money on and many people find themselves spending money right up to the last minute. I know I still have a "few more things" I want to pick up before the holiday arrives, and every trip to the store seems to include a novelty item or two that relates to the holidays. I always promise myself I'll stick to a budget and not go overboard on Christmas and I always fail. Miserably. But there are SOME ways I find to save money during the holiday season. Here are some of my favorites:
- Skip the ribbons. Use yarn to tie up packages and make pom-poms to adorn them. It's super easy to make them - just wrap one, two, three or more colors of yarn around your hand or fingers 20-30 times. Slip the loop off and tie onto the package in the middle. Snip the loops and, voila! Instant pom-pom! These are cute, resist crushing (so they work well for mailing packages), and can actually be re-used (or re-purposed as a cat toy!)
- Most of us receive numerous Christmas cards. I have a few ways to recycle them. For traditional cards (non-photo cards), cut off the fronts and keep them in a shoebox. Over the years these come in handy as gift tags. Sometimes, I've used a template to cut out a smaller design so the tag is much smaller than the original card. Other times, I keep the card it's original size. This year, I found a cute new use for the cards: package homemade treats in regular brown paper lunch sacks. Fold the tops over 1 inch and hold a card front to the top edge. Using a hole punch, punch through both bag and card and use ribbon or yarn to tie the card onto the bag. Write your greeting on the card. Another fun project is to lay a card flat on a work surface. Using a craft knife, cut slits in the card lengthwise, leaving a 1/2 inch margin at top and bottom. Roll the card and staple the edges. Then, "scrunch" the card from end to end. This creates a fun "paper lantern" effect that you can hang from the ceiling or use as ornaments. Speaking of ornaments, here's another fun one. Using two cards, cut a square from each card. Fold like a fan, making small folds. Once you fan-fold both squares, attach them in the center using a stapler or pipe cleaner. Then, spread the fan-folds out from the center, making a beautiful butterfly. These look pretty set in the branches of trees.
- For photo cards, I often want to keep them. But I never know what to do with them. One year I purchased a holiday photo album on sale after Christmas. The next year, I just slipped in all the old photo cards. It's fun to take it out only at Christmas and see how much everyone has changed from year to year. Another year, I cut off the holiday greeting part and kept the photos to put in a regular album. Bonus: the holiday greeting part I cut off doubled as a gift tag.
- Gift-giving. Everyone loves treats at Christmas. Find something great and duplicate it for all your friends and neighbors. It doesn't have to be fancy, expensive or unique. A simple candy recipe or favorite cookie is fine. Or go with something non-sweet to offset all the holiday treats. One year a neighbor gave out homemade seasoned rice mixes. I've made bath salts, soap, and other non-food treats. If salsa is your specialty, whip up a big batch and give out a bowl with a bag of chips. My sister has made rum cakes assembly-line style and wraps them up for an impressive gift. I have a great homemade Bailey's recipe that everyone loves. I make double batches and bottle it in condiment bottles I get on sale at my local one-stop shopping store.
- Christmas cards. Many have stopped sending these holiday greetings. I think it's sad, because I really enjoy catching up with friends and seeing how much kids have grown in photos. While Costco has super cheap photo cards, you can go even cheaper by taking a great photo of your family and having it duplicated at a local drugstore (take advantage of coupon specials!), and mounting it on holiday-colored card stock. All you need is a glue stick and some scissors. If you want to get creative, add embellishments, but a simple greeting on the back is all you need. And you can send it like a postcard to save even more money on postage!
- Dollar stores! I can't say enough about dollar stores for great holiday gifts at bargain prices. I love the Dollar Tree, but you might have a favorite in your area. Every year since my kids were little, we did our annual "dollar store" shopping. Each child selected a gift for everyone in the family (sometimes adding in grandparents and friends), carried their own basket and paid for their purchases on their own. They also wrapped all the gifts themselves. Believe it or not, there are some very useful items at dollar stores that make great gifts. I've received candles, note pads, makeup and soap. My husband often gets tools, flashlights, sunglasses and candy. For each other, they've purchased stuffed animals, toys, art supplies, jewelry and other items. It was a great way for the kids to choose and take ownership of their own gift-giving at a price we could afford.
- Dinner. Unless you're hosting a huge dinner party, you don't need to spend a ton of money on Christmas dinner. One year, when I was pregnant and my friend had a baby on Christmas, we were so busy celebrating the new baby that I completely forgot to do anything about dinner. We had cereal. It was still a great Christmas. For years, one of my family traditions was to have appetizers and snack type foods for Christmas eve. My family loves to eat this way (we call it "feast") and we can usually make some pretty fun foods from things we have around the house. Sometimes we'll buy a tray of shrimp as a special treat and make chocolate fondue with fruit and cake for dipping as a dessert. Slaving over a fancy meal on Christmas day, after weeks of shopping, wrapping and preparing is a terrible way to spend the day. Go potluck for big family gatherings and skip the traditional dinner for smaller gatherings. "Feast" on what you love.
- Artificial trees. I know. I once was a traditionalist. I could not fathom anything other than a fresh-cut evergreen for the holidays. But after a few years of trees so dry all the needles fell off, animals dumping over or drinking from the water in the stand, and more than a few impossibly crooked trees, we finally bought a fake tree. It wasn't meant to be permanent - I bought it because I wanted my soon to be visiting parents to see how pretty my tree was. But all the needles fell off and I had to throw the tree out. I just happened to be at a drugstore one day and there was an artificial tree 90% off! It didn't even have the original box, and the store staff just put it in a big box for me to take home. Each branch had to be fitted into the correct slot by hand. The plastic base broke one year and the tree fell on my head. We fixed it with duct tape. Finally, this year, we bought a new, pre-lit tree from Costco. The overall savings has been about $640 in the years since we've had the artificial tree. We paid $250 for our new tree. The savings alone is astounding. And the evergreen scent? It comes in a bottle these days and is incredibly similar to the real thing.
- Just don't. Don't spend too much. Don't feel you need to buy the latest gadget or get everything on your kids' lists. Don't feel obligated to run out and buy that expensive electronic they suddenly ask for a week before Christmas. Don't try to do everything.
I'm still working on that last one. But even a little savings here and there adds up. And it's nice to go into the new year debt-free from the holidays. As much as I'd love to take my kids to see a show downtown, complete with dinner and holiday festivities, my two youngest just spent the last two hours constructing a fort to sleep in. It's a holiday tradition, started by them and continued by them. It's magical and fun and little-kiddish and doesn't cost a cent. I'm going to go see it now. Have fun saving money! :)
Showing posts with label traditions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label traditions. Show all posts
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Scrooge Alert!
Normally I love the holidays. I'm not sure why I "love" them, except that when my kids were little it was SO much fun to bring the magic of Christmas and presents and cookie baking and crafts and toys to their little worlds. As they get older, there's not as much magic. There's too much busy-ness, not enough time, cookies are generally baked from some prepackaged dough ON Christmas eve because there's nothing to leave out for Santa, no one is interested in crafts anymore (and who has time?) and it really does seem to be all about the gimmes.
Sure, the kids "love" Christmas. But I'm not sure exactly what they "love" about it. Is it the gifts? The anticipation of the gifts? Watching Christmas movies? Decorating the house? This year I was sick right after Thanksgiving which is when we traditionally decorate the house. I was in bed for five days and actually felt disdain from my kids for not putting up the tree. In the end, Jeff bought a new tree, and two of the four kids have still not put their decorations on it. Arlie ended up doing most of the decorating herself. When I was finally able to hobble from my deathbed to check the progress I was horrified to see the kids had put decorations out on dusty shelves and filthy floors that had not been vacuumed. I was too sick to care and it was days before I felt like things were sort of "done" being decorated.
Tonight I came home from being gone literally ALL day, working, running errands, mailing Christmas cards and packages, and driving Arlie to dance to find the kitchen a total disaster. Hayley had made cupcakes with her friends and neglected to clean up the mess. She just left it all over the place and went out to party with some more friends. Cupcake batter in the bowl tossed in the sink, un-rinsed, on top of a pile of other dishes. Both sides of the sink FULL of dirty dishes. Dinner food left out (no one ever bothers to put the food away after dinner - it's either Jeff or me - never anyone else). Counters are covered in sticky stuff, kitchen table covered with crap including a plate from LAST night's dinner that I reminded Hannah to pick up. But she ignored me. They all do. I post chore lists, I remind, I ask, I nag, I scream, I yell, I ignore. Nothing changes. No one does anything. If they do anything at all, they do it half-assed and never with any intention of doing their best.
Many times I've watched a piece of trash get kicked around the kitchen floor for days. It will migrate up the hallway, ending up in a totally different place, because NO ONE will pick it up. EVER. I've purposely not picked things up, just to see how long it will sit there and get kicked around. And the record is.....two weeks. And then I couldn't stand it anymore and picked it up myself.
Today my son ran out of toilet paper in the downstairs bathroom. He was within calling distance of anyone who was downstairs and could hear him, never mind he's glued to his cell phone at all times, so he could have easily remedied the situation with a text. Instead he used a roll of paper towels that was sitting in the bathroom (likely still there from the last time someone cleaned up dog pee, which seems to be a daily occurrence around her because ....guess what? No one lets the dogs out!). Any dummy knows you don't flush paper towels down the toilet, but he did. And then he threw the rest of the roll in the garbage! Jeff found it and wondered what jackwagon would throw away perfectly good paper towels? Harrison's explanation was that because he used them for toileting purposes he didn't want to touch them again because they were "germy". WHAT THE EFFFF???? He cares about germs? Then, why does he never change his sheets, or leave piles of dirty laundry stacked up in his room for months, or think tossing a paper towel over a saturated carpet of dog pee is adequate to sanitize the spot? These are the things that make me want to poke my own eyes out with a fork.
And what have I been doing every single day for the past two weeks? Shopping for Christmas presents. Agonizing over whether I have "enough" for each kid, worrying that I don't have the perfect gift for their "big" present, buying extra presents for them to unwrap along with their advent house openings because candy doesn't seem adequate enough. So far they've opened two movies, a Wii game, a coloring book and a CD of Christmas songs. Why? Why do I think they need more. More. More.
They don't even take care of what they have now. Their rooms are piled with dirty laundry and "stuff". They have so many clothes, they can go without doing a load of laundry for weeks before they run out of things to wear. The girls have jewelry they never wear. There are games that are never played, iPods that can't be found because someone was too irresponsible to take care of it, and more than once, I've found Christmas gifts on the floor of their closets months later with the tags still on them. They want for NOTHING.
And yet, every year I buy them a treasure trove of gifts. I try to stick to a budget, but with the expensive electronics that top their lists, it's hard to get more than one thing within the budget I can afford. I try to keep up the magic of a tree overflowing with packages that seems to double in size on Christmas morning. I spend, quite literally, DAYS buying and wrapping gifts only to have them opened in a half hour of frenzied paper ripping, then put into haphazard piles while they go on with their day. I have to nag them to take their piles up to their rooms. And they sit there. Forever. They pull things off the pile bit by bit - clothes they want to wear, body wash they want to use, but most of it gets buried under dirty clothes and forgotten. One year, after spending several weekends cleaning their rooms, I found a whole shoe box full of beauty products, jewelry and makeup that had never been opened. I put it all in my "gift" box for birthdays and such and doled it out over the next few years whenever the kids needed a gift for a birthday party they were attending. They didn't even remember it had once been theirs.
And now. It's December 14 and I cannot remember what all I've bought. I thought I was "done" shopping days ago, but I keep remembering something or someone else I need a gift for. I could not tell you everything I've purchased for each kid. I have no clue how much I've spent. I started out keeping track of everything down to the penny. And then things got crazy and I got sick and I simply ran out of time to keep it up.
I mailed packages to my family minus the home-baked treats I wanted to include. The only Christmas baking I've done is to bake up some of those preformed and stamped Christmas tree cookies from Pillsbury. I have big plans to make homemade Bailey's and treats for the neighbors but I have no idea when I'll have time to do that.
One thing that normally gets me in the spirit of the season is holiday gatherings and attending the kids' holiday concerts and performances. I missed Arlie's band concert and both of Hannah's choir concerts (one because I was sick, the others because Hannah was sick). I missed the one holiday party we were invited to. I'm missing my work holiday party because I've already committed to something else the same night. I also enjoy receiving and reading Christmas cards. I've received exactly four cards this year. I'm guessing either everyone is as behind as I am or people just aren't sending cards this year. Maybe I should take a cue from them. I spent twice as much on our holiday card this year because I went with a different printer and I wrote our Christmas letter in about ten minutes and it wasn't funny or clever or witty as I hoped it would be.
I have a whole list of holiday activities I want to do but no idea when we'll fit them in before everyone goes to their other parents' homes for the remainder of the holiday. We only get the first week of vacation with them, and really not even the first whole week as my kids go to their dad's on the 23rd and don't come home until late on the 24th. I get cheated out of a whole day of "my" week which makes our family time together even shorter. We always run out of time to do all the fun things I've planned and then they're gone. It's so much stress and not enough fun. Every year I say I'm going to do something different......cut back, do something meaningful, spend more quality time, not get caught up in the craziness. And every year nothing changes. I feel like throwing in the towel. It's not like we have a big, extended family celebration. We rarely have visitors at Christmas time. We could do anything we want and no one would care. We could "skip Christmas" and go on a vacation. We could spend more time doing things together and less time shopping and spending money we don't have. But we don't. And I'm not sure why. Nothing changes because I don't change it. I'm the keeper of the traditions and if I change things, I, alone, will bear the wrath. I feel stuck and I don't know how to change things. But things....they need changin'.
Sure, the kids "love" Christmas. But I'm not sure exactly what they "love" about it. Is it the gifts? The anticipation of the gifts? Watching Christmas movies? Decorating the house? This year I was sick right after Thanksgiving which is when we traditionally decorate the house. I was in bed for five days and actually felt disdain from my kids for not putting up the tree. In the end, Jeff bought a new tree, and two of the four kids have still not put their decorations on it. Arlie ended up doing most of the decorating herself. When I was finally able to hobble from my deathbed to check the progress I was horrified to see the kids had put decorations out on dusty shelves and filthy floors that had not been vacuumed. I was too sick to care and it was days before I felt like things were sort of "done" being decorated.
Tonight I came home from being gone literally ALL day, working, running errands, mailing Christmas cards and packages, and driving Arlie to dance to find the kitchen a total disaster. Hayley had made cupcakes with her friends and neglected to clean up the mess. She just left it all over the place and went out to party with some more friends. Cupcake batter in the bowl tossed in the sink, un-rinsed, on top of a pile of other dishes. Both sides of the sink FULL of dirty dishes. Dinner food left out (no one ever bothers to put the food away after dinner - it's either Jeff or me - never anyone else). Counters are covered in sticky stuff, kitchen table covered with crap including a plate from LAST night's dinner that I reminded Hannah to pick up. But she ignored me. They all do. I post chore lists, I remind, I ask, I nag, I scream, I yell, I ignore. Nothing changes. No one does anything. If they do anything at all, they do it half-assed and never with any intention of doing their best.
Many times I've watched a piece of trash get kicked around the kitchen floor for days. It will migrate up the hallway, ending up in a totally different place, because NO ONE will pick it up. EVER. I've purposely not picked things up, just to see how long it will sit there and get kicked around. And the record is.....two weeks. And then I couldn't stand it anymore and picked it up myself.
Today my son ran out of toilet paper in the downstairs bathroom. He was within calling distance of anyone who was downstairs and could hear him, never mind he's glued to his cell phone at all times, so he could have easily remedied the situation with a text. Instead he used a roll of paper towels that was sitting in the bathroom (likely still there from the last time someone cleaned up dog pee, which seems to be a daily occurrence around her because ....guess what? No one lets the dogs out!). Any dummy knows you don't flush paper towels down the toilet, but he did. And then he threw the rest of the roll in the garbage! Jeff found it and wondered what jackwagon would throw away perfectly good paper towels? Harrison's explanation was that because he used them for toileting purposes he didn't want to touch them again because they were "germy". WHAT THE EFFFF???? He cares about germs? Then, why does he never change his sheets, or leave piles of dirty laundry stacked up in his room for months, or think tossing a paper towel over a saturated carpet of dog pee is adequate to sanitize the spot? These are the things that make me want to poke my own eyes out with a fork.
And what have I been doing every single day for the past two weeks? Shopping for Christmas presents. Agonizing over whether I have "enough" for each kid, worrying that I don't have the perfect gift for their "big" present, buying extra presents for them to unwrap along with their advent house openings because candy doesn't seem adequate enough. So far they've opened two movies, a Wii game, a coloring book and a CD of Christmas songs. Why? Why do I think they need more. More. More.
They don't even take care of what they have now. Their rooms are piled with dirty laundry and "stuff". They have so many clothes, they can go without doing a load of laundry for weeks before they run out of things to wear. The girls have jewelry they never wear. There are games that are never played, iPods that can't be found because someone was too irresponsible to take care of it, and more than once, I've found Christmas gifts on the floor of their closets months later with the tags still on them. They want for NOTHING.
And yet, every year I buy them a treasure trove of gifts. I try to stick to a budget, but with the expensive electronics that top their lists, it's hard to get more than one thing within the budget I can afford. I try to keep up the magic of a tree overflowing with packages that seems to double in size on Christmas morning. I spend, quite literally, DAYS buying and wrapping gifts only to have them opened in a half hour of frenzied paper ripping, then put into haphazard piles while they go on with their day. I have to nag them to take their piles up to their rooms. And they sit there. Forever. They pull things off the pile bit by bit - clothes they want to wear, body wash they want to use, but most of it gets buried under dirty clothes and forgotten. One year, after spending several weekends cleaning their rooms, I found a whole shoe box full of beauty products, jewelry and makeup that had never been opened. I put it all in my "gift" box for birthdays and such and doled it out over the next few years whenever the kids needed a gift for a birthday party they were attending. They didn't even remember it had once been theirs.
And now. It's December 14 and I cannot remember what all I've bought. I thought I was "done" shopping days ago, but I keep remembering something or someone else I need a gift for. I could not tell you everything I've purchased for each kid. I have no clue how much I've spent. I started out keeping track of everything down to the penny. And then things got crazy and I got sick and I simply ran out of time to keep it up.
I mailed packages to my family minus the home-baked treats I wanted to include. The only Christmas baking I've done is to bake up some of those preformed and stamped Christmas tree cookies from Pillsbury. I have big plans to make homemade Bailey's and treats for the neighbors but I have no idea when I'll have time to do that.
One thing that normally gets me in the spirit of the season is holiday gatherings and attending the kids' holiday concerts and performances. I missed Arlie's band concert and both of Hannah's choir concerts (one because I was sick, the others because Hannah was sick). I missed the one holiday party we were invited to. I'm missing my work holiday party because I've already committed to something else the same night. I also enjoy receiving and reading Christmas cards. I've received exactly four cards this year. I'm guessing either everyone is as behind as I am or people just aren't sending cards this year. Maybe I should take a cue from them. I spent twice as much on our holiday card this year because I went with a different printer and I wrote our Christmas letter in about ten minutes and it wasn't funny or clever or witty as I hoped it would be.
I have a whole list of holiday activities I want to do but no idea when we'll fit them in before everyone goes to their other parents' homes for the remainder of the holiday. We only get the first week of vacation with them, and really not even the first whole week as my kids go to their dad's on the 23rd and don't come home until late on the 24th. I get cheated out of a whole day of "my" week which makes our family time together even shorter. We always run out of time to do all the fun things I've planned and then they're gone. It's so much stress and not enough fun. Every year I say I'm going to do something different......cut back, do something meaningful, spend more quality time, not get caught up in the craziness. And every year nothing changes. I feel like throwing in the towel. It's not like we have a big, extended family celebration. We rarely have visitors at Christmas time. We could do anything we want and no one would care. We could "skip Christmas" and go on a vacation. We could spend more time doing things together and less time shopping and spending money we don't have. But we don't. And I'm not sure why. Nothing changes because I don't change it. I'm the keeper of the traditions and if I change things, I, alone, will bear the wrath. I feel stuck and I don't know how to change things. But things....they need changin'.
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Thanksgiving eve........
'Tis the eve of Thanksgiving and I have not prepared one pie, chopped a single onion, unwrapped one stick of butter. My turkey is still partially frozen. I know all you Martha Stewart wannabes have already made your pies in advance, made your own bread for stuffing last week, starched your table linens, and painstakingly prepared adorable centerpieces for the table out of fall leaves and pine cones. Well, la-di-dah for you.
I'm tired and I have a new job and I've been doing a lot of Christmas shopping these past few days. I bought all my Thanksgiving dinner supplies last Sunday so everything is here in the house. I'm sure I'll have some semblance of turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes and gravy, sweet potatoes, green beans and homemade rolls put together by tomorrow around dinner time. I might make a dessert if I have time, but if not, I was proactive and bought two pies. They're in the freezer.
I never understood why my mother got up before dawn on Thanksgiving day to put the turkey in. A turkey does not take all day to cook. But we always ate really early on Thanksgiving day. Why? Why, if it's called "Thanksgiving dinner" did we eat at 2 in the afternoon? And who decided we had to have all those traditional foods anyway? I love me some mashed 'tatoes and gravy, and sweet potatoes are delish, but honestly, the turkey is just "eh" and stuffing is gross.
I think all festive holiday meals should include "feast", my favorite dinner of all time. Feast is when you have a bunch of different foods. Ideally it would include several different appetizers, dips and fancy cheeses and crackers. Then, there would be all manner of fruits and veggies arranged in colorful displays on platters. There might be chocolate to dip the fruit in, and some savory dips for the veggies. In short, there would be many choices, some sweet, some savory, all delicious. Who wants to cook and clean all day for one heavy, fatty, greasy meal that leaves you bloated and tired?
I guess I'd feel differently if we were having company. Then, I'd feel obligated to clean, and set the table all fancy and serve up a feast. But it's "just us" and I'd rather just enjoy time with my family than cook. I don't like to cook anyway. I love preparing appetizers and desserts, but preparing an entire meal feels like drudgery to me. Especially one that involves a twenty pound turkey. I say the new Thanksgiving dinner is this: shrimp platter with cocktail sauce, Little Smokies in barbeque sauce, sausage balls, something made with Pillsbury crescent rolls, Beecher's Flagship cheese and fancy crackers, fruits (perhaps something fancy - figs?), veggies and dips, bruschetta, parmesan crisps. Dessert would be chocolate fondue with fruits and cake to dip, homemade chocolate chip cookies, peanut butter balls, and mini pumpkin pies. Everything would be served on super cute paper plates with matching napkins and cups. We'd sit around and watch old family videos, look through photo albums, play some games, maybe watch a movie. We'd take lots of pictures, and get in our jammies early and watch TV. That would be a day I look forward to. Not one that involves taking a gizzard out of a turkey. Maybe it's time for a new tradition..........
I'm tired and I have a new job and I've been doing a lot of Christmas shopping these past few days. I bought all my Thanksgiving dinner supplies last Sunday so everything is here in the house. I'm sure I'll have some semblance of turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes and gravy, sweet potatoes, green beans and homemade rolls put together by tomorrow around dinner time. I might make a dessert if I have time, but if not, I was proactive and bought two pies. They're in the freezer.
I never understood why my mother got up before dawn on Thanksgiving day to put the turkey in. A turkey does not take all day to cook. But we always ate really early on Thanksgiving day. Why? Why, if it's called "Thanksgiving dinner" did we eat at 2 in the afternoon? And who decided we had to have all those traditional foods anyway? I love me some mashed 'tatoes and gravy, and sweet potatoes are delish, but honestly, the turkey is just "eh" and stuffing is gross.
I think all festive holiday meals should include "feast", my favorite dinner of all time. Feast is when you have a bunch of different foods. Ideally it would include several different appetizers, dips and fancy cheeses and crackers. Then, there would be all manner of fruits and veggies arranged in colorful displays on platters. There might be chocolate to dip the fruit in, and some savory dips for the veggies. In short, there would be many choices, some sweet, some savory, all delicious. Who wants to cook and clean all day for one heavy, fatty, greasy meal that leaves you bloated and tired?
I guess I'd feel differently if we were having company. Then, I'd feel obligated to clean, and set the table all fancy and serve up a feast. But it's "just us" and I'd rather just enjoy time with my family than cook. I don't like to cook anyway. I love preparing appetizers and desserts, but preparing an entire meal feels like drudgery to me. Especially one that involves a twenty pound turkey. I say the new Thanksgiving dinner is this: shrimp platter with cocktail sauce, Little Smokies in barbeque sauce, sausage balls, something made with Pillsbury crescent rolls, Beecher's Flagship cheese and fancy crackers, fruits (perhaps something fancy - figs?), veggies and dips, bruschetta, parmesan crisps. Dessert would be chocolate fondue with fruits and cake to dip, homemade chocolate chip cookies, peanut butter balls, and mini pumpkin pies. Everything would be served on super cute paper plates with matching napkins and cups. We'd sit around and watch old family videos, look through photo albums, play some games, maybe watch a movie. We'd take lots of pictures, and get in our jammies early and watch TV. That would be a day I look forward to. Not one that involves taking a gizzard out of a turkey. Maybe it's time for a new tradition..........
Friday, December 24, 2010
Thank God for......
It's Christmas eve and I'm up early. Of course, I've remembered a few things I still need to do/get before tomorrow and am planning my trip to the store as I write this. And reading people's Facebook posts about cleaning and wrapping and frantically getting ready for big family celebrations made me wistful for a big family celebration. But this year it's just us - the six of us - alone on Christmas. I used to think that would be the WORST feeling, to not have any family around to celebrate on Christmas or Thanksgiving or any other holiday. But then I learned the worst feeling is not having your kids around. Thank God I get them back for Christmas eve and day. I've lived in fear of the "kid-free" Christmas since my divorce and so far, it hasn't happened. Lucky for me, their dad and I are always able to work something out. And the kids WANT to be here on Christmas. But reading about how others are celebrating with big, extended family celebrations always makes me a little sad. Sure, I don't have to clean as thoroughly or cook for hours or wrap extra presents, but I'd still rather have a big, crazy, chaotic family celebration with my extended family.
It's easy to focus on what we DON'T have at Christmas - enough money, family to celebrate with, time to shop, wrap, cook, bake - and I'm just as guilty at the next person of focusing too much on the "stuff" of Christmas rather than the spirit of Christmas. I spend HOURS shopping and choosing the presents for my kids that both fit my budget and their desire. I always go over my budget and end up with a stress stomachache about it. I spend an inordinate amount of time worrying about fitting everything in - the requisite cookie baking and decorating, the drive to see holiday lights, the parties, ordering the Christmas jammies, etc. More than anything I worry about the TIME I spend with my kids now that I have to share them.
I do believe Christmas is about the birth of Jesus and all that, but hey, even he got gifts, so there's that. But more than the Christmas story about Mary and Joseph and baby Jesus, for me, Christmas embodies a time spent with the people you love the most and being grateful for what you DO have. We've had a rough year financially, even to the point of nearly losing our house, and I've felt an enormous amount of guilt for not being able to give my kids the experiences of their peers. But it's so trivial compared to knowing what we DO have. A loving family, time to spend with them, good times and a lot of laughter. That gets us through every single day and I'd rather laugh a hundred times a day than have a hundred dollars every day.
I love hearing about people's Christmas traditions. Groups of women getting together to bake a certain cookie or make a certain traditional treat. Women-only shopping trips that include a special Christmas show or event. Ugly sweater parties. Seeing The Nutcracker. Visiting Santa. We have some traditions of our own, that have evolved through the years and through the blessing of our blended family. For one, building a "fort" in Harrison's room is standard. We even have the material for the "tent" part of it - and ironically, it's a giant tablecloth from my first wedding (we got ink on it and had to buy it from the rental company! I never thought we'd find a use for it!). We MUST buy chocolate Advent calendars before Dec. 1. And fill our adorable Advent house that Mimi bought us with chocolate treats for every day in December leading up to the 25th. Everyone gets new Christmas jammies and they have to arrive early in the month so we can bask in the adorableness of them all month long. We decorate the same $12 tree each year that I bought on sale 90% off early one January. We hang artwork the kids created in kindergarten. We get a new ornament each, sometimes going on a special trip to pick them out, sometimes being surprised by mommy. We drive around to look at lights. We decorate sugar cookies - sure, this year I ran out of time and bought those ridiculous pre-cut ones, but STILL. We count down the days till Christmas (the kids with anticipation, me with "how many shopping days" mentality). And Christmas day comes........we film the kids coming downstairs to see what Santa brought, we unwrap the gifts under the tree, then we empty stockings. Later, we sit around amongst paper, candy wrappers, and way too much commercial packaging with that slightly stunned "that's it?" look on our faces because it's all over so early, and the anticipation always beats the actual event by a long shot. But still..........
We all get that blessed day where the main focus is on those you love. And we're truly blessed that we're healthy, have a beautiful home, lots of friends, a good life. Merry Christmas to all!
It's easy to focus on what we DON'T have at Christmas - enough money, family to celebrate with, time to shop, wrap, cook, bake - and I'm just as guilty at the next person of focusing too much on the "stuff" of Christmas rather than the spirit of Christmas. I spend HOURS shopping and choosing the presents for my kids that both fit my budget and their desire. I always go over my budget and end up with a stress stomachache about it. I spend an inordinate amount of time worrying about fitting everything in - the requisite cookie baking and decorating, the drive to see holiday lights, the parties, ordering the Christmas jammies, etc. More than anything I worry about the TIME I spend with my kids now that I have to share them.
I do believe Christmas is about the birth of Jesus and all that, but hey, even he got gifts, so there's that. But more than the Christmas story about Mary and Joseph and baby Jesus, for me, Christmas embodies a time spent with the people you love the most and being grateful for what you DO have. We've had a rough year financially, even to the point of nearly losing our house, and I've felt an enormous amount of guilt for not being able to give my kids the experiences of their peers. But it's so trivial compared to knowing what we DO have. A loving family, time to spend with them, good times and a lot of laughter. That gets us through every single day and I'd rather laugh a hundred times a day than have a hundred dollars every day.
I love hearing about people's Christmas traditions. Groups of women getting together to bake a certain cookie or make a certain traditional treat. Women-only shopping trips that include a special Christmas show or event. Ugly sweater parties. Seeing The Nutcracker. Visiting Santa. We have some traditions of our own, that have evolved through the years and through the blessing of our blended family. For one, building a "fort" in Harrison's room is standard. We even have the material for the "tent" part of it - and ironically, it's a giant tablecloth from my first wedding (we got ink on it and had to buy it from the rental company! I never thought we'd find a use for it!). We MUST buy chocolate Advent calendars before Dec. 1. And fill our adorable Advent house that Mimi bought us with chocolate treats for every day in December leading up to the 25th. Everyone gets new Christmas jammies and they have to arrive early in the month so we can bask in the adorableness of them all month long. We decorate the same $12 tree each year that I bought on sale 90% off early one January. We hang artwork the kids created in kindergarten. We get a new ornament each, sometimes going on a special trip to pick them out, sometimes being surprised by mommy. We drive around to look at lights. We decorate sugar cookies - sure, this year I ran out of time and bought those ridiculous pre-cut ones, but STILL. We count down the days till Christmas (the kids with anticipation, me with "how many shopping days" mentality). And Christmas day comes........we film the kids coming downstairs to see what Santa brought, we unwrap the gifts under the tree, then we empty stockings. Later, we sit around amongst paper, candy wrappers, and way too much commercial packaging with that slightly stunned "that's it?" look on our faces because it's all over so early, and the anticipation always beats the actual event by a long shot. But still..........
We all get that blessed day where the main focus is on those you love. And we're truly blessed that we're healthy, have a beautiful home, lots of friends, a good life. Merry Christmas to all!
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